Help Me
by NekoKat3
Summary: Izaya Orihara knows something is going wrong inside his head. He's been crazier than normal and has took his mind games to a new level. He can't help whats's going on inside but who can, if anyone?
1. First Kill

Izaya Orihara gazed down from the top of the twenty story dilapidated housing complex. His eyes following the small ant like dot of one of his lovely humans. It was his next prey, so pitiful that human was. The human did not match this part of Ikebukuro. This part of Ikebukuro was the places not even Shizuo, Celty, or Simon would go. Everywhere you looked was lovely humans passed out in the street, selling themselves or drugs, and fights. There was a stench of desperation, blood, angst, and the illegal.

That lovely humans name is or soon is going to be was Kyo Yamamoto. His suit flutted as he ran from the prostitute and drug dealers. He turned in a dark dank urine smelled allyway. Izaya chuckled knowing he set his trap up right. Humans are so easy to read. Kyo slipped in something wet that didn't smell like water. He stood again only to take one step and fall through the ground. Izaya smirked and left to go to the allyway. He got there and smiled a smile that took up his whole face. He had put the one stake in the most perfect spot so it would go through the man's leg or thigh. He knew he had a small chance of his plan working but it did. He had always wanted to use a Burmese tiger trap.

Kyo awoke and almost wanted to scream at the stench that was invading his nostrels. Ammonia, urine, smoke, and death was all he could smell. He knew his illegal slave trade was wrong atleast in the eyes of others but for what he went threw so far he doesn't think he deservied it. He peered around the room and froze with what he saw. The room was filled with torture devices. The Rack, The Virgin of Muremberg, and the Brazen Bull stuck out the most. Kyo broke out in a cold sweat and started to hyperventilate. Tears burned his eyes knowing he was not going to make it out alive. He heard light tap taps that where getting louder. His heart pounded until it felt like it was going to sear a hole through his chest.

A door creaked open and a wave of light flooded the room. There stood the man named Izaya Orihara. Everyone in Ikebukuro knows what he looks like and what he does. Kyo whimperd a wave of dread going down his spine. Orihara smirked and walked over to the torture devices on the other side of the room. He walked slowly and deliberatly letting fear rise in his prey. He knows what he's going to do and he knows what kyo is going to do and how long it will take him to go bye bye. He ran his pointer finger over sharp tools of pain. He watched Kyo twitch and shudder. Oh how he loved messing with _**HIS **_lovely humans minds. When Izaya was in this mode all he saw was that one human. He would devote all his time to that one human till he got what he wanted.

Orihara's mind went blank. He was only thinking of spilling the precious liquid of life. The crimsion liquid would flow and cover the whole room maybe even cover himself if he allowed it. His heart raced in anticipation. His mouth watered uncontrolablly. He knew he couldn't control himself much longer. his mind was making wild fanastys that involved an over exaggeration of blood. He imagined The Rack pulling kyo's limbs in an agonizingly slow way for both of them. He could hear the screams of pain. He saw the appendages being ripped off. He couldn't take it anymore.

Kyo had a blind fold put around him. The darkness made him start feeling like a crazy person. Every noise seemed to be louder tha normal. Something started to drip on his face. His mind started to race thinking of all the things it could be. The conclusion his mind came up with was that Izaya Orihara was going to drown him. He started to open his mouth when water went down it and made him sputter and cough. He knew now that he was going to down. He could do nothing about it either.

How sad this human was. Izaya may love all humans but he was enamored with some more than others. This guy was nothing to him, one of his least favorites. Izaya was going to use the Chinese water torture till he was sure his mind was gone. Then it would be off to The Rack. He was readly to test it out. He knew lately that he has not been in the right state of mind, well more so than normal. He was hiding it very well from Celty, Shinra, and even Shizu-chan. If they found out Izaya wonders what they would do. Maybe Celty and Shinra would be worried and Shizu-chan would try to kill him even more. Izaya decided to let the water torture go on for a day and come back eventually to start on The Rack.

* * *

><p>Izaya had left his home and was walking down the streets of Ikebukuro. In only an hour or so he would be back with his prey. He could not wait. He may have been an annoying human but humans like him need to be preyed on. Just like the story called the "The Most Dangerous Game" the weak are here to give pleasure to the stong and Izaya considered himself god. He spotted blond hair and knew that it was his Shizu-chan. He did not like Shizu-chan but he was an interesting human to play around with. Shizuo turned feeling the aura of madness.<p>

Shizuo noticed black spikey hair in the crowd of people. Anger bubbled up around him clouding his vision. All he saw was Izaya that is how he sometimes injured bystanders. How he hated Izaya. He hated nothing more in the world. He ran after Izaya grabbing a light pole along the way.

"IZZZZZAAAAAYYYYYAAAAAA," yelled the man dressed as a bartender.

"Shizu-chan, how great it is to see you," Izaya sang as he ran,"it's dangerous to run with a light pole. Didn't your mother ever teach you that. Sorry I can't stay and chat I have something else I have got to do."

Orihara had vaulted over a safety rail and landed off in an alleyway. He got away from Shizuo after thirty minutes and was making his way back to where his lovely prey was. He didn't look around as most would when they were going some where or doing something you shouldn't, that's just to suspicious.

Kyo's mind was gone. He was drooling because his brain had suffered to much shock and had trouble controlling certain functions now. He wanted to die. Izaya was just messing with him and would probably let him go soon but he knew he wasn't going to be the same mentally.

The door was opened and in walked Izaya. Kyo couldn't see him but he heard everything. He was unbound and dragged by Izaya. He was layed down on something stiff that felt like wood. Orihara grabbed his appendages and bound then the the wood. Izaya slowly took off the blindfold and threw it to the side.

Kyo turned his head away from the soft amount of light a light bulb was giving off. He had turned his head to where he could see what he was strapped to and screamed. Izaya covered his ears and smirked. Kyo couldn't belive that he was trapped to The Rack. What did he do to deserve it. Water streamed down his face from is eyes. His brain shut itself off knowing what was coming next.

Izaya's hand grabbed the crank next to the instrument and slowly started to turn. He could hear Yamamotos breath come out in gasps. He felt the strain he was making on Kyo's arms and legs. He heard the bones pop as Kyo screamed. He saw the arms being ripped off. Blood, skin, and shards or bone went every where. He was covered in blood as Kyo slowly died from blood loss and tried holding back a laugh but he couldn't. It was the most maniacal and demented laugh anyone would have ever heard.

Izaya stopped laughing and stared at the body of the young man. Tears went down Izaya's face. Izaya couldn't help it something was going wrong with his mind. All he could think about was blood and death. He fell to the floor and his tears turned to sobs.

* * *

><p>Here is the first chapter to my new story. Izaya is my favorite so it kinda made me sad to make him suffer pain but it's all for the good of the story. I'm super duper sorry if you find any misspelled words. If you do find any mistakes please tell me so I can fix them and improve but don't be a jerk and be like oh this story sucks...how do you think this is good...or anything like that. I do love constructive criticism though.<p> 


	2. To Write Love on Her Stomach

Izaya Orihara walked through the alleyways of Ikebukuro when that feeling flooded his mind. He hated it know he couldn't control himself. He sat hoping the feeling would pass without to much of a problem. His thoughts drifted as he tried to ignore that nagging feeling. He remembered the girl whose life he ruined. Alpha, the girl who used to go school with him. The girl with a short hair cut that was the color of black licorice. Her eyes that where a bright happy shining sea green. The girl who was always happy and tried to be friends with everyone. The girl who was no longer sane.

* * *

><p>Alpha called him brother even when Izaya would argue with her about him not being related to her. He would add that she had a real brother to call brother. She was the first person he felt this nagging feeling around. He held on to his sanity for a little while but soon his sanity had left. It took all his will to not jump her at Raira Academy.<p>

He remembered walking to her home and knocking on the door. She greeted him and let him in feeling no reason to fear the informant. That was her first mistake. Mistake number two was leading him into her kitchen where some dangerous objects are.

Izaya sat at the breakfast bar scooping the room finding many things he could use against Alpha. His eyes immediately went to the slicer knife that was in font of her knife holder. His eyes looked it up and down in anticipation. The Knife seemed to gleam with Izaya's anticipation of the thoughts in his head.

He sneaked over and grabbed it before Alpha had even ascended the stairs to the second floor. When she came back she didn't even notice the knife missing. Mistake three and four were leading Izaya alone and leaving the knife out, respectively. It cut into his leg as he shoved it into his pocket. It felt so good to him.

Izaya felt a little blood slip out of the laceration. He surpressed a laugh that was threatening to burst from him. Alpha peered at him in awe while he was distracted. Her one sided love was showing through. She didn't know of Izaya's plans for her.

Izaya asked where the bathroom was and then left the kitchen. He arrived at the bathroom, thoughts already forming in his mind. He filled Alpha's tub up with hot relaxing water. He imagined it filled with blood but quickly shook the thought away. He called her up to the bathroom saying he couldn't find any hand soap. Alpha walked in and spotted the soap immediately. Izaya locked the door and and slung her into the tub. She cried out not prepared for being tossed in the hot water.

Water invaded her petite body making her gag. Izaya smirked at her pain and discomfort. He pulled off his shirt and jacket so they wouldn't get damp with water and blood. Alpha tried to get her bearings until izaya climbed into the tub and sat on her. She lost any thoughts she had about escape once he did this. Even though he had attacked her she still blushed at seeing Izaya with his shirt off and sitting on her. His muscles rippled under his skin. He looked so thin but really he was muscular.

Izaya stared down at her with his signature smile which made Alpha blush even more. She couldn't help it even if Izaya was skinning her alive she would probably blush like a maniac. Izaya's hands slid across the water and up her body until it reached her neck. he stopped as he assessed the situation. Alpha felt something poke her leg and she yelped as it cut her. Izaya smirked seeming to just remember the knife he had removed from her kitchen.

He pulled it out and slowly drew it across the water. Alpha's heart speed up and not in a good way. Izaya dragged it across her skin enough to draw tiny beads of blood. She gasped. Izaya went over the cuts deeper this time. Blood flowed down her side but still the cuts were not deep enough to kill her. It would take at least an hour or so for her to have extreme blood loss. Her eyes pleaded before she started to fight off Izaya.

Izaya forced all of his weight upon Alpha and placed the knife against her neck. That didn't stop her completely as she started to kick him. Izaya did not find this amusing and his face showed it. He knew the most interesting way to mess with her mind. he leaned down and kissed her. He lingered for a split second but that split second led Alpha's mind into chaos.

Alpha froze up as her brain shut off. Izaya smirked knowing he wouldn't have to worry abut her fighting him anymore. He made cuts and carved her name on her own arms. He even went as far as to carve I Love You on her stomach so she would always see it. Izaya figured it was enough for now and stood to get out of the tub. One good thing about having Alpha as a victim was that she had an older brother who wore the same size as Izaya. He could "borrow" his clothes. Alpha's brother took care of her. He was off on a business trip ,though, and would not be back soon.

Izaya changed his pants and went to clean up his lovely mess he made. He plucked up Alpha as if she weighed nothing. He then proceeded to wipe off the blood with a black towel. The cuts had quit bleeding before he started to dress the lesions. Once done he picked her up again and took her to her bedroom. Alpha stared off into space her mind still in chaos.

Izaya pushed the door open with his foot. He dropped her onto the bed, not caring if she bounced off, and went to find some dry clothes for her. He found some sleep shorts and a tank top and changed her into them. Izaya then threw back the covers and placed her under them. He left the house acting as if nothing had happened.

* * *

><p>Alpha awoke to light hitting her in the face. She blinked right before soreness exploded throughout her body. Pain coursed through her like a replacement of adenalin leading her into a gasp. She jerked up not thinking straight, reopening the wounds.<p>

She let out a string of curses before realizing she was bleeding, changed, and that Izaya was gone. Her heart clamped. Izaya had tried to kill her. He had really tried to kill her. She started shaking and forgot about her bleeding and fell to the floor. Blood stained her snow white carpet but still she didn't move until many minutes later. She grabbed new clothes and went to take a shower which was hard with all of her shaking.

Blood swirled down the drain almost hypnotizing her. Her thoughts traveled back to Izaya carving on her. She shook her head trying to pretend it didn't happen. She rushed the rest of her shower so she could clean her carpet before it set too much into the material. Soap burned her wounds bringing tear to her eyes. At least she didn't have school for two days.

She got out of the shower and dried herself off, wincing every time the cloth came into contact with her skin. Blood smeared across the towel. She dressed her wounds and changed her clothes into a tank and running shorts.

In the mirror she could see the carvings Izaya did on her. It made her want to empty her stomach and cut off the skin he carved on. She loved Izaya but knew he didn't love her so seeing that carved on her stomach sickened her. He played with her emotions. Always have and always will.

She winced walking back to her bed. She collapsed on it and clicked on the TV. She disappeared inside herself arguing about what had happened. She argued about if she was going to go to school or not. After going back and forth for a long time she agrees she should go to school. She decided she would so Izaya wouldn't get anymore sick satisfaction from the ordeal. Alpha didn't know how long she would be able to survive arguing with herself. She didn't know if Izaya would do it again.

The mental arguing with herself made her feel like the main character in the _Tell Tale Heart_. She felt as though she were making herself insane. She couldn't go to sleep thinking Izaya was going to come back. Every time she heard a noise she would jump and start to shake. Every time she saw a wound she would tear up. She cried not to cry but failed miserably every time.

* * *

><p><strong>Sooo I noticed that all of my OCs seem to get hurt a lot. I don't mean too. It just happens. On the bright side, I really like this chapter and worked pretty hard on it. I would love to hear feedback on if it, was bad or okay or Amazingly Freakin Awesome! <strong>


	3. Mental Instability

Izaya noticed he had fallen asleep while thinking of the past. He shuddered as the cold seeped into his jacket. He needed to get home. He needed to sleep some more. He needed to never wake up again. He destroyed so many lives.

He felt the need to visit Alpha. He didn't want what happened at the hospital to happen again though. Just because he could not control himself he destroyed a person he could control without much work. But it was Alpha's own fault for loving him so much that she was so easy to control is she was not like that maybe she would not be in the state she is in now.

Izaya got home and immediately got ready to take a shower. He looked at his body in the mirror and wondered what all those females saw in him. He only saw God, Devil, and Monster. He noticed a scratch on his flawless body and prodded it wondering how he got it. He then got in the shower and let the water run down him.

His vision flashed and was replaced with a different view of what had happened with him and Alpha. He was Alpha but he was himself too. He was downing his own self. It caused him to struggle slightly but he forgot the soap in his hands and dropped it. He slipped on it and lay on the shower floor. The shock had brought him back to reality.

He took a deep breath before getting up to clean his body and hair. He got out and wrapped a towel around his waist. He wiped off the mirror to stare at his pink slightly burned skin. He changed into boxers and a black wife beater before heading off to bed.

* * *

><p>I can do this; I can do this, Alpha kept repeating in her head. No one can see my wounds though my clothing. Just act normal and no on will notice.<p>

Alpha took a deep breath then entered the school. No one took time to look at her and ignored her as usual. Her friend Emi waved and called her over. She went over and they chatted the whole time until the first bell rang for class. She was in her seat right before the tardy bell rang.

The teacher didn't waste anytime and started his lesson. Time dragged on until it was lunch. Alpha went to the restroom and didn't hear someone come in after her. When she exited her stall she saw the mirror and gasped. She heard something inside her crack before running to clean off the mirror.

_**I LOVE YOU 3**_

Those three words stared at her. She wiped at it getting red paint on her hand. It ran down the mirror reminding her of her own blood. She heard another crack. She dried off the mirror. It looked normal again until she saw Izaya's face in it. Not thinking she punched him. Blood and glass went everywhere. She still saw his face in all the shards of the mirror. She let out a scream as her mind broke.

A female teacher ran to the bathroom to find her laying on the ground curled in a fetal position. She gasped pulled out her cell phone and called the emergency number. Ten minutes later Alpha was being taken a way on a stretcher. She mumbled incoherent things that only she could understand.

People watched from the windows of their classroom. Some cried while other just stared in shock but one person had a smile on his face. It was so fun to break her.

* * *

><p>Alpha stared at the wall. The doctors had called her brother and soon he would be back. It is not that she doesn't love him but she just doest want him to see her in this state. How would Omega act to see her like this?<p>

The door opened and in walked a male of about twenty-five. He was tall around six and a half feet. He had shaggy black hair and aquamarine eyes. He wore a business suit.

"The doctors told me you tried to harm yourself-" he started.

"I didn't try to hurt myself. I promise," I pleaded.

"Maybe so but it doesn't help that you are no longer mentally stable," he dropped the bomb. He didn't say it gently. She had been trying to forget this possibility that she insane. Maybe she was. It was all Izaya's fault though.

"The doctors are going to send someone to help but if it fails you are going to be transferred into an asylum," he was always strait to the point. She gasped in shock.

"I must leave for now because the doctors said that it would be better without family there to mess with the healing process," he said as he walked out of the door.

* * *

><p>At night she was scared. She could smell the hospital all around her from the death to the cleanness. She heard someone walk towards her door her heart beat quickened. It opened to a nurse. She was young and had pink hair with purple eyes.<p>

"It's time for your medicine. Don't be scared, okay," she injected some fluid into the already liquid filled sacks. Alpha's mind went fuzzy and soon she fell asleep.

It had been three days and Alpha was doing fine. No strange outbursts or hallucinations. It was perfect untill he showed up.

Izaya got tired with all his other fans and decided to visit his most favorite one. He went to the hospital, asked where she was, and never got asked why he was there.

These humans are so pitiful but I love them, he thought. Izaya got to room 313 and opened the door. He walked in and stared at the sleeping Alpha.

"Alpha. Alpha," he whispered. She mumbled an answer," Alpha wake up."

Alpha woke and screamed. Izaya smirked before vaulting out of the window to the tree and landing on the ground gently. He was not a parkour master for nothing.

Alpha would not stop screaming. She woke up other patients in the hospital. Doctors and Nurses ran to restrain her. One injected her with something to make her feel as though she was floating. She stopped struggling and passed out.

She faintly heard talking.

"We thought she was almost sane enough to go on with her life but apparently not. We are really sorry about your sister. We must now transfer her to St. Margret's Home," the lady speaking sounded sincere enough.

At least I will be away from him, Alpha thought.

Maybe not, a voice answered in her head.

* * *

><p><em>I'm sorry if this chapter has a lot of mistakes because I don't have time for someone to read over it. I just wanted you guys to have a chapter out this week so it was kind of rushed. When I get back I will repost if there is a lot of errors. I have an idea for another Izaya story. I have not seen one like it yet even though Izaya talked about Valhalla. It will most likely be a long one-shot so just be prepared for that.<em>

_Ah Alpha now has a voice in her head. This will be last chapter of the past. It will be the present from now on but I might show what Alpha is like in present time. If any of you guys have any questions or you see something that does not make sense remember to ask. Wow this has been a long authors not but whatever._


	4. Talking With a DEMON

Izaya loved to walk around Ikebukuro and watch his lovely humans even if a certain brute didn't want him to. Speaking of the brute he had not seen him at all today. Usually Shizuo seemed to have an uncanny ability to find him. It was slightly creepy to say the least. A vending machine flew right past Izaya's head.

Speak of the devil and he shall appear, thought Izaya. He looked ahead to see the blonde ex bartender staring him down like a Cape Buffalo. Shizuo charged toward Izaya. Izaya lazily stepped aside at the last moment to avoid the man. Shizuo crashed into a wall, blood went down his head.

"Ah uh Shizu-chan, you should take better care of yourselves or maybe you shouldn't, it would make it easier for me. Sorry for this short chat but I have some business to take care of so bye," Izaya spun and took off down an alleyway. Shizuo followed; he was not going to let the flea get away.

Izaya thought he had got away from the brute and made his way to St. Margret's home. He was going to pay a visit with Alpha even if he could only see her. He took the long rout and doubled back a few time to make sure he wasn't followed.

Shizuo stared in shock of where he saw the Informant go. Why would he be at a psycho ward? It made no sense, unless he was going to screw with already mental heads. He may not be the smartest but Shizuo was not dumb even he could figure this out. He walked in to see where Izaya said he would go.

* * *

><p>"Excuse me I would like to visit Alpha Xanthis. I hope I am permitted too?" Izaya questioned.<p>

"Okay but she is not allowed to talk to outsiders. If you wish to communicate you must wait for an appointed time that we give you," the lady smacked on her gum as she spoke. She looked as though she wanted to be anywhere but here.

"I would like to make an appointed time," Izaya answered the lady who obviously didn't want to have to make an appointment.

"Okay the closest time we have is three days from now at exactly three p.m. If you do not show before the time you will not be allowed to see her until another appointed time. That will be a month from now at the least," she grumbled.

"Okay thank you," Izaya spun as he said it and then left.

"Weirdo," she mumbled. She typed on her keyboard to set up the appointment.

Shizuo was in shock. Izaya did not have the right to see Alpha. What he did to her was unforgivable. Even for Izaya torturing her like that was inhumane. If Shizuo was considered a monster than Izaya must be Satan himself, wait no not even Satan would do something like that. He had standards.

Shizuo had saw Alpha at school. He saw her try to conceal her pain and terror but someone who was called a monster could see through it. He felt compelled to help her but she didn't last long enough.

"Izaya you bastard you better not mess her up anymore or else I'll kill you!" Shizuo muttered so no one would hear.

* * *

><p>Alpha sat in her plain room. It was quiet boring when you did not have anything to entertain yourself because most things are considered dangerous. Maybe she did hear voices and maybe she dreamt those nights so long ago over and over again but she was not crazy.<p>

Alpha had changed a lot since she had got put in the hospital. Her hair grew long and was not at her shoulder bladders. Her eyes were no longer shining and were now a dull color. Her skin was sickly pale from not being allowed outside. She had bags under her eyes from the constant nightmares and the voices in her head.

Alpha no longer blamed Izaya-nii. She believed it to be her fault as she was too weak to counter his actions. If he were to show up it would not bother her. She would act normal and forget what had happened.

"Look at that pretty butterfly," she spoke. It was hard for her to tell what was real and what was not anymore but she knew the butterfly was real. She reached over and grabbed it but accidentally squished it. She frowned, another innocent thing destroyed.

* * *

><p>Izaya showed up one hour before the allotted time as he wanted to see how his beautiful humans acted in a place like this. A male who looked to be ten walked around with his hand held out as if holding hands with someone. His mouth moved to speak to something only he could see. A woman was walking before suddenly thrashing around. Nurses and Doctors came to restrain her. They gave her a shot to still her before setting her in a wheelchair with straps and wheeling her away.<p>

Even if I am crazy I will not allow myself to be in this place, Izaya thought with vigor.

The people before were not even the scariest. Next was a grown man who ran with a knife and flailed about. Some of the big bulky "security" guys who were used just for these situations came out and knocked him to the ground sending the knife flying. He was put in a straight jacket after being injected.

"Hey Iza-nii," a timid voice said from behind him. He turned seeing and older version of Alpha. She looked so sickly.

"Hello Alpha. I came to visit you. Want to go to your room," Izaya was going to be shocked if people could actually visit a patient's room. Patients may not be good word inmates or victims seem more like it.

"Okay follow me," Alpha quivered out. It was not that she was scared of Izaya but she was scared of being here in the hospital. They both entered her room which it was slightly comical since her room number was 666, "Sorry for the mess. I was just allowed time for art."

The art looked like something a demented child would draw. It had no skill it was just there. Sometimes there would be a knife or a bathtub in the pictures. They where scattered about.

"Its okay Alpha. I won't be here long. I just have a few questions for you," Izaya stated as if talking to a child, which in this predicament Izaya didn't know if she was going to act as one. He did not want to get caught here messing with Alpha's mind.

"Ah okay ask anything you want there are cameras but they don't record sound," Alpha stated knowing her was going to ask.

"Are you tired of being here? Do you want to leave? What was the weirdest thing that happened here? What are you willing to do to get out of here?" Izaya asked it all at once as to not waste time.

"Um of course I'm tired of being here so yes I want to leave. The weirdest thing was these two little girls who were covered in paint at least I think it was paint. No the attacked someone earlier and they were put in solitary confinement. Some how they got a ball and they were playing catch with it made the red stuff get everywhere. They had the creepiest smiles you would have ever seen on their face. Then they licked the red stuff off their face. Then they put one arm around each others shoulders and smiled at me," Alpha had started to hyperventilate.

"Take a deep breath and calm down," told Izaya. She did that and she calmed back down.

"To get out of here I would do anything," she pleaded.

"Okay now you just have to wait till I come to get you from here," Izaya said as he stood to leave.

"Bye," Alpha muttered to thin air after he left. Please come back quick, she thought.

* * *

><p>Izaya smiled he could finally get his dog back. She was a dog because she was so easy to control. Once he broke her out she would have to do anything he said. Her life is once again in His hands. He could break her if he decided to.<p>

"Now I must keep her leaving the hospital a secret. Even when she is out no one must know," he made a weird face;"Great it's the monster."

Indeed it was Shizuo but Izaya was too tired to play the happy informant act. Shizuo turned and was about to charge when he say Izaya's face. The face made him forget to breath. It was the face of someone who had no soul. It was a stare that bore into him. His eyes seemed to take all the evil in the world and focus it on one point specifically Shizuo. The eyes then showed terror and pain before flipping back to that horrid stare. Izaya turned and left.

When he left Shizuo remembered he had not breathed. He took in a big gulp of air but coughed when it reached his lungs. Shizuo was not to smart but he knew that was not the Izaya Orihara everyone knew and hated. That was some monster who had took over the annoying informant.

* * *

><p>Hello readers! I hope you enjoy this chapter. It feels weird to me seeing Alpha change because at first she was just going to be a character to be attacked but know she has become one of the main characters. I forgot to ask this last time but what do you think of Omega? To me he is a super jerk and doesn't seem to care for his sister. What do you think of Alpha having to rely on the one who tired to kill her?<p> 


	5. I'm Not Okay I Promise

Shizuo went home and collapsed on his bed. This was the first time he had been afraid of the usual happy-go-lucky informant. He reached up to wipe the sweat on his forehead. It was sticky and when he brought his hand down he saw blood. He went into the bathroom to clean himself up.

Shizuo took off his clothes to take a shower. That Izaya was not the one he knew. This one was made up of hatred, evil, and everything that was not sugar, spice and everything nice. His finger traced the scar Izaya had given him as his birthday present this year. He sighed before getting into the shower letting the water run down him.

After the shower was over Shizuo got dressed to go to bed. He lay in the darkness of the room which always seemed comforting but now it seemed deadly. He kept seeing the face Izaya had made at him. It made him uneasy. Tomorrow he decided after he got done with work he would ask Shinra if he noticed a change in Izaya.

* * *

><p>Izaya had his plan formulated on how to get Alpha out by the time he got back to his home. Tomorrow morning he would visit Shinra and get him to write a doctors note saying Alpha was going to be taken to another doctor, one who kept patients in touch with the outside world.<p>

Izaya was going to keep a close watch on Alpha. A **very** close watch.

* * *

><p>Izaya awoke happy. Soon his favorite human to mess with would be back under his control. Once everyone wanted him as their God, Alpha would be nothing more.<p>

Izaya preformed his daily routine before leaving to visit Shinra. He knew he probably couldn't use his façade as a happy informant if he wanted the job done. His must be his true self. Well, his true self at this moment.

Celty was with Shinra watching him work. She enjoyed watching his daily tasks. Well, she really just loved Shinra and everything he does in general. The doorbell buzzed and she stood to answer it. There she saw the informant that loved all humans.

"Ah Celty-san! How wonderful it is to see you here! I hope I'm not interrupting anything," Izaya said suggestively and with fake concern. He really didn't want Celty there.

"_Izaya, we both know you don't care if you even were interrupting something. Why are you here?" _Celty typed out like a speed demon.

"Ah how you hurt me so. I am just here to talk to Shinra. Alone, actually," he said pretty much telling her to leave. If she had a head she would have raised her eyebrow.

"_Don't do anything stupid Izaya," _Celty typed with fury. She didn't know **why** she was going to listen to the young man, but she felt as if she would be safer away from him. She sent a text to Shinra telling him she was leaving.

Izaya walked to Shinra but turned to plop on his couch. His legs were in the air swinging about. Shinra just stared no longer questioning his friend. Izaya wasn't going to waste any time.

"Shinra, I want you to do something for me," Izaya said. He hated asking others for help but he had to in this case.

"Must be something important if you're asking me for help. What is it?" Shinra spun his chair around to face the young informant.

"I don't think you will accept. I want you to write a doctor's note," Izaya whispered as if someone was listening in on the two people.

"That's not hard to do, so there must be more to the request. Tell me Izaya," Shinra was worried. Izaya never got sick. He might be sick in the head, but never physically sick.

"I want you to write a note to get someone out of a mental institute. You need to pretend to be another doctor that wants to take care of a patient that has shown a considerable amount of change in their mental capabilities," Izaya spoke in one breath and continued on, "Because I want her back under my control. She must be let out. She even wants to have me save her!"

Izaya started to laugh uncontrollably. His red-brown eyes seemed to glow red with evil intentions and Shinra could see it. He shivered because of the fear he felt.

"Izaya you know I won't do that. Come sit down so I can get you some medicine or something. Then we can get you some help," Shinra said in a soft voice trying to reason with the maniac.

"I'm not crazy Shinra! I never will be! Don't act like I am losing my sanity when it's obvious that I am not!" Izaya started to blubber out nonsense. He started crying. Shinra timidly put his arm around Izaya not knowing what he was going to do.

"It's okay Izaya. If you agree that you are not okay then it will be easier to get help," Shinra spoke like a true doctor.

"I don't want help! There is no need for help! I can make myself stop hurting others anytime I want!" Izaya screamed. He was tired of hearing from Shinra. He pushed Shinra into a chair and tied him up. He put a gag in his mouth.

Izaya went to Shinra's medicine cabinet. He knew exactly what torture to do, pharmacological. Since Shinra happened to be a doctor, even if he was an underground doctor, he had syringes. He rummaged through the cabinet till he found the bottle he was looking for. He stuck the needle in the top and got some in the syringe.

Shinra's eyes widened and sweat started to fall into his eyes burning them. He was staring at the words on the bottle. Izaya smirked knowing Shinra knew what was happening. He sat on the table in front of his captive and injected him with the liquid.

Shinra's skin burned at the injection site. His body felt as though Izaya had thrown him into a blue fire. He started thrashing but the rope that tied him to the chair prevented too much movement. His thrashing made the needle tear at his skin, leaving a long laceration. Tears streamed from his face and he was screaming and choking because of the pain and gag.

"Ail houw eht!" he screamed with the gag in his mouth; Izaya frowned and removed the gag, "I'll do it! I'll do it! I'll do it! Please stop!"

Izaya took the other syringe that was in his pocket and filled it up with what was in the bottle he brought with him. He injected it into Shinra's other arm. The pain immediately stopped and Shinra wanted to cry from relief but with Izaya still here he wouldn't take the chance.

"Okay thank you Shinra-chan. You know how much I love you, right?" an innocent smile adorned Izaya's face. Shinra was not going to believe that face never ever again.

Izaya handed Shinra a paper to write out his note. After he was done Izaya read over making sure there were no hidden notes or anything in it. When he was satisfied he hugged Shinra. Shinra stiffed at the contact. Izaya turned and left without so much as a goodbye.

Shinra reached over to his phone but remembered his arm was throbbing. He cleaned the cut quickly before texting Celty. He would have to do a better job later.

Celty stood outside Shizuo's apartment building. She wanted to talk with him about Izaya when she got a text from Shinra.

_Celty I need you to stay away from Izaya! No matter what happens don't go to him. I want you to leave to another part of Ikebukuro. He's gone insane and there is nothing we can do for him! I want you to not come home unless I tell you. If you see him go in the opposite direction. If you hear him leave. JUST STAY AWAY!_

If Celty had eyes they would have widened in shock at the message she had just read. Her chest felt like it was exploding from the pain. Izaya may have been a troll but Shinra was still his friend and something terrible must have happened for him to send this text. She didn't want to leave but she knew she couldn't ignore what Shinra told her.

* * *

><p>Shizuo was at Shinra's apartment. He was expecting to hear Shinra talking to Celty, but not crying. He turned the knob of the door expecting it to be locked, but it wasn't. So much was wrong with this picture and Shizuo knew it.<p>

Shizuo saw Shinra sitting in his chair crying. Ropes and a gag were lying on the floor. He saw the bandages wrapped on his right arm and a large band-aid on his left. Anger pumped through his body like blood.

"Shinra, what happened?" Shizuo yelled at his friend.

"Izaya has gone crazy, insane, psycho! He has become obsessed with Alpha and torture!" Shinra wept.

It dawned on Shizuo that Izaya wasn't acting strange just to him. It was to everyone.

"I know. Yesterday he was like a demon! He had this blank look. He never has a blank look. It's always creepy. I guess we should have seen it coming, huh? –with what he did to Alpha and all," Shizuo laughed but it was more of a nervous laugh. Shinra had stopped crying.

"I sent Celty away so she wouldn't get hurt. Should we send away your brother and ones who would be most likely to get hurt?" Shinra asked. Should they try to protect them or would it be a waste?

"If we do that the flea might try harder. Might as well just have Celty tell them to stay away," Shizuo offered.

"She's probably already on it," Shinra smiled sadly.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Setton has joined the chat<strong>_

_**Setton: Anyone know if Kanra has been on lately?**_

_**Tanaka Taro: No she has not. I've been wondering where Kanra was. She always seemed to be on until two weeks ago. **_

_**Bakyura: Is there something we should know, Setton?**_

_**Kyo has joined the chat**_

_**Mai has joined the chat**_

_**Dotachin has joined the chat**_

_**Mai: is there something we need to know about our idiotic sibling?**_

_**Kyo: ...**_

_**Setton: Be careful around Kanra. If you see her stay away. She has changed.**_

_**Tanaka Taro: Changed! Changed how?**_

_**Setton: If I ever see you I will tell you but not now. I see her…I must—**_

_**Setton has been disconnected**_

_**Bakyura: I hope Setton is going to be okay.**_

_**Kyo…Yes.**_

_**Mai: Don't worry if we see Kanra we will make sure she is under a bus.**_

_**Mai has logged off**_

_**Kyo has logged off**_

_**Dotachin: I'll make sure my group stays out of the way**_

_**Dotachin has logged off**_

_**Tanaka Taro: Bakyura...**_

_**Bakyura: Yeah I know.**_

_**Bakyura has logged off**_

* * *

><p><em>Sorry guys for such a late update but my computer was messing up and we had EOCTs. This chapter is a little longer to make it up. Do you think Izaya can stop anytime he wants to like he says? Do you think Celty is okay? Who is next to be a victim?<em>


	6. Misery Is My Middle Name

Izaya wanted to say he was not okay but that damn nagging feeling would always press against his mind. He wanted to stand on a building where he could scream and everyone would hear him. He wanted to be so high that it made him sick; high enough so he would **explode**.

He wondered why Shizuo didn't kill him. He wanted it, hell even urged for it. He was sick and no one could help him. Maybe he should let his sisters throw him in front of a bus, just like he did to Shizuo. Yes that would be best for him. **Just end it now!**

Would that be the best, really? His lovely, spoiled, stupid humans would go to waste, but look at him now, hurting his humans. Their blood was spilled, life was ended, and his **new** life begun. Could this even be called a life?

Walking the streets was getting harder. The blood around him pulsed like the deep bass in a club. It made the air feel thick and it made it harder to distinguish from right and wrong. Every human made him want to **snap**. A violent force would slam against his head, was this what Shizuo felt when he saw Izaya? – making him want to kill.

He called Shizuo a monster but who was the real monster? Izaya knew who wand called himself that everyday. It tore at his insides leaving him in constant pain. It ripped through his skin leaving a bloody trail of thoughts and dreams. This was the best way to describe how he felt. **Every. Minute. Of. The. Damn. Day**.

People say you should never believe death is the answer, well for Izaya that was true. He would say that is how he lived his life but now, he would welcome death over this pain. Shizuo, Shinra, Celty, Masaomi, any of them should get a taste of this pain, then maybe they would put him out of his misery. He would never do it himself as suicide is a thing his low, pitiful, spoiled, and dirty humans did.

He called Namie to go and buy him a journal. She didn't question anything he did, not after the night he came home broke. He was covered in blood and unmentionable parts of a human body. He wept for him and the one whose life he destroyed.

He bawled until he fell asleep and even then tears went down his face. She would have loved to see him this way except she had to deal with him the next day and clean up the blood stained furniture.

* * *

><p>Namie brought the journal to Izaya and left without saying anything. He turned to the first page and wrote as if his life depended on it and maybe it did. Maybe if someone read this they could save him. He hated how he had to rely on something that held no life to bring him the happiness he wanted.<p>

He wrote and wrote. He wrote until his hand cramped and he couldn't move it. He wrote until blood veiled parts of his hand. Nail marks were left in his palm from clenching his hand into a fist.

He read the first thing he wrote. It described what he felt. All. The. Damn. Time!

_**Help me. Help me. HELP ME. HELP ME! Why won't you help me! Do you not see that you can end it! Shinra! Celty! Shizuo! Why won't you get help!**_

He cried as he read it and placed his bloody hand on the page. The blood and water mixed on the page leaving it permanently stained. An animalist sound rose from his throat leaving him shocked. He had never been so afraid in his life as to have a sound like that emitting from his throat. He has never made a gurgling sound in his life, not even when his best friend beat him up in elementary school.

He pulled out his phone and dialed in Shizuo's number. He needed to say something before he couldn't do it ever again.

"What," Shizuo grumbled into the phone. If Shizuo had looked at the caller I.D he may not have answered the phone.

"Shizu-chan, ngghh, help me," Izaya managed to plead in between sobs. Shizuo could hear them rattle in Izaya's chest.

"Izaya! What have you done!" he knew he shouldn't yell at the pitiful informant but old habits die hard as they say.

"Kill me. Kill me! I don't want to live anymore. No I don't deserve to live anymore! It's inside me and I don't know what to do! I can't go against it! It won't let me!" his voice first started out normal then it turned into hysterics and then broke into a whisper Shizuo had to strain to hear.

"Izaya, calm down. This isn't you. You need to come to 'Bukuro so we can try to help you," Shizuo felt bad for the young man.

"Hah! You feel sorry for me! Don't you? Don't feel bad! Get angry! Kill me! Kill me! Do something," Izaya was a mess and both the men knew it. Izaya couldn't take it; if Shizuo wasn't going to do anything, well he would forget about him. He hung up the phone and threw it against the wall where it proceeded to burst on contact.

Somebody! Anyone! Why won't you help me? Is this my punishment! Well hear me out! Tomorrow my plan will activate and soon all of this will be over!—Izaya screamed in his head. Tears still streamed down his face even after he passed out.

* * *

><p><em>Author's note<em>

_Okay so I know it's short but I wanted to write how Izaya felt about his situation. I almost cried while writing this so I feel like a baby. What do you think it Izaya's plan? Should people try to help Izaya or is he to far gone? Next chapter will more than likely be back on track with getting Alpha out of the hospital. Sorry for any mistakes you happen to see. If you find any just tell me and I will fix them._


	7. Blood is Thy Enemy

"_Disease, insanity, and death were the angels that attended my cradle, and since then have followed me throughout my life.__"  
><em>**_Edvard Munch_**_  
><em>

* * *

><p>Izaya hated himself for the breakdown he had. He was supposed to be strong. Soon he would not have to worry about being strong, though. Soon he could end his pitiful life and start his other life, the life where nothing mattered.<p>

Today was the day Izaya was getting Alpha out. She didn't know it but she was the main point in his plan and in less than a year everyone would hear of the informant who went insane. Perhaps she would never know she was a sacrificial queen. Maybe even when this was over she wouldn't know.

Izaya thought it was going to be harder to convince the doctors of the hospital to let her out but in reality he just spoke and they did as he said. Pawns, every one of them pawns in his plan.

"Okay Mr. Orihara she can leave as soon as you need her," the doctor was so stupid; has he never heard of Izaya before?

"Alright I will take her now," it sounded as if he had just bought her.

"Be careful. Whatever you do, do not let her see her own blood. She will panic. The best thing to do if that does happen is get her mind off the blood by asking random questions," the doctor said but the doctor didn't know that it was Izaya's fault in the first place.

He was lead to Alpha's room by a nurse who could really stand to wear some less revealing clothing. Her dress barely reached mid-thigh and the top looked as if it were about to burst. Izaya hated women like that, just another pitiful human.

The door to her room was unlocked so Izaya just sauntered in. He knew Alpha would not care. He looked at her spread eagle like on her back. She stared at her white ceiling in awe of its pureness.

Izaya could see her stomach and chest rise with every breath she took. She wore a black short sleeved shirt with no distinctive patterns or designs on it. She also wore plain black pants. They didn't have any buttons, zippers, or drawstrings on them, probably so patients couldn't hurt themselves.

Alpha slowly turned to see Izaya in her room. He had his holier-than-thou smile on his unblemished and perfect face. His rust eyes brought a little color to her completely white room. Even if she wore black it just meant that those patients may have suicidal tendencies.

"Get up Alpha, you are coming with me," he started to walk away knowing she would follow like a puppy.

"Ye-yes," she stuttered out. She couldn't wait to be outside. She wanted to feel the life from the sun. She wanted to smell the people. She wanted to hear the sounds.

She could see the door in view. She walked faster, imagining the doctors and nurses trying to stop her from leaving. Her heart quickened in fear. The door seemed to get father away but when she blinked she was suddenly in front of the door. She bumped into Izaya only seeing the door.

"Hm. Are you afraid they will try to stop you? They won't," he knew her inside and out.

"Ah," that small sound was enough for her answer. She walked around Izaya and pushed the door open. The sun blinded her and filled her with warmth she had not felt in awhile. It filled her with joy.

Izaya chuckled at her childishness. Her face had exploded into the brightness of the sun but when you're locked up like her it kind of made sense. This had been the first time she had been outside since she was taken in. Her skin was so pale that it seemed to look like snow.

She looked around, her eyes widening in surprise of how busy the streets where. She looked at Izaya with a pleading look. She wanted to hang outside. He frowned but nodded anyways and started walking.

After about twenty minuets of walking, they were in front of a building that said Russian Sushi. Alpha turned to Izaya and tilted her head in questioning. Izaya just smiled and pushed her in the building.

"Ah Izaya! You bring friend to have sushi," a black man said with an accent.

"Yeah Simon. This is Alpha she will be around me for now," He pushed her into a seat at the bar. She looked around.

"You want fatty tuna, right? What about Alpha," Simon smiled at the girl.

"Uh I don't like sushi but if you have crab or something it is okay," it felt weird for Alpha to ask about having normal food.

"Yeah. Simon don't give her too much since her stomach may not be able to handle it," he looked at her clothes that hung off her skinny body. Simon nodded and got the food for them.

Alpha tried to eat like a normal person but it was too hard. She gave up and shoveled the crab into her mouth. Izaya stared in disgust.

"Alpha stop, you could get food poisoning and I really don't want to take care of you," Izaya's eye twitched. She slowed down, her stomach starting to hurt.

"Ngh," she hated getting sick this easily.

"See what you did? Simon, we are leaving," Izaya pulled Alpha off the stool and left. Simon waved goodbye.

Izaya did not meet Shizuo which he was glad about especially after his breakdown and Alpha being with him. They reached Izaya's home in Shinjuku. Alpha collapsed to his couch and stared at the ceiling. Her shirt had come up slightly showing her protruding ribs.

Izaya looked at how frail she was. She quickly stood up. Izaya looked with questioning eyes as she ran the bathroom. She was over she ran out into the kitchen and opened the fridge. She found a knife and looked at it. To her it was weird to touch something so "dangerous" again.

"Alpha what are you doing," she jumped at his voice and the blade sliced across her hand. Blood poured from her wound. Her blood glistened. Her heart raced. Tears poured down her face as she started to hyperventilate. She dropped the knife and it clattered to the floor.

Izaya caught her before she fell to the ground and dragged her to the couch. Her breathes came but then seemed to disappear. What the doctor told Izaya came to his mind.

"Alpha! What is your favorite flavor of ice cream?" Izaya could use this to his advantage. He left to get the first-aid kit.

"Ah ngh it's moose tracks," she answered but the blood still held her attention. She scratched her face but got blood on herself. Blood pooled onto her clothes that was under her body.

"What was your least favorite subject?" Izaya yelled from the bathroom.

"Um ah it was math. Izaya! Izaya! IZAYA!" to her the blood looked at if it was going to suffocate her.

"I'm coming just think of some thing else. Do you want to live? Do you hate feeling like you do? Do you ever want to go back to the hospital? Have you ever thought about death?" these questions were the good questions but not the most important. He had to sneak it in.

"Ngh, yes. Yes. No. Yes. Yes!" the blood it laughed at her. Izaya came back with the right materials for cleaning her wound. He wanted to see her face when she answered the question. He started to dress the wound.

"Do you have feelings for anyone? Do you wish the world revolved around you? Do you hate pain? Do you love me? Do you want an animal," he questioned all at one hiding his main one.

"Ye-yes I do. I think everyone wants the world to revolve around them. I hate pain but pain lets me know I am still living. Of course I love you why else would I not be completely scared of you. I want a cat or a kuvasz or maybe something exotic like a red panda," she answered them without a thought. Then it hit her, she said she loved him! She sputtered in embarrassment. Izaya just ignored her for now and fixed her hand. It would need stitches so tomorrow he had to go to Shinra.

Izaya now had to handle Alpha. Getting the answer he got made psychological manipulation so much easier. He stared at her and watched her chest bob with her breath. He saw the heat rush to her cheeks and smirked at the rabbit. Yes rabbit was a good comparison.

He leaned close to her face and could smell her fear, anxiety and anticipation. He could feel her pulse. Her heat radiated off of her.

"W-What are you doing?" she questioned. Her voice was filled with a mixture of anxiety and eagerness.

Izaya smirked inwardly and leaned in closer. He felt her body tense up underneath him. He looked into her eyes and slowly her body relaxed. She looked at him with complete eagerness and when he kissed her she didn't resist anymore.

_Why am I letting this happen again? Remember what happened last time he kissed you Alpha, he destroyed your life. He left you to lose yourself. He even enjoyed it. Why am I enjoying this? This goes against the nature of all the thoughts I have had after that moment. It would be better to go along, right? If I don't who knows what could happen; focus Alpha, just focus, _she could feel herself losing the battle with Reason as she slowly accepted his kiss. She didn't know how long they stayed like that, and as her thoughts of whether this was right or wrong subsided, she felt as if she could stay like this forever.

Izaya let her savor the kiss for a while before he grew too sick to continue touching her. He broke off the kiss with one quick motion, and as she stared at him in confusion, he smiled at her with an expression that he had learned gives off the impression of love. He figured his guess was right on the money as her face turned a very unflattering shade of red.

Izaya jumped over the back of the couch and landed in a crouch position. He stood and walked away but stopped remembering that he was going to say something.

"Ah Alpha remember to get some rest because you have had a hard day," Izaya turned again. A demon like smirk appeared on his face once he turned so Alpha couldn't see.

* * *

><p>Author's Note: Thank you DrinkTheBleach for being right beside me during this and helping me with the creep fluff thing. How should she have reacted to the kiss? Do you hate Izaya for what he did? Are you dissapointed in Alpha?<p> 


	8. To Plant a Seed

This girl was perhaps the most idiotic girl he had ever met in his whole life. She blushed when her ex-torturer kissed her! She slept soundly in the house of a killer. It made no logical sense! Even if she did stay in a mental hospital it made no sense!

"Alpha get up we have to get you some stitches," Izaya fought with himself to try and stay nice. He hated her he really did. It wasn't because he couldn't control her, no it was because she was way to easy. It wasn't a challenge! He couldn't wait to get rid of her!

"Okay!" she followed him like a puppy to the door. The travel to Shinra's was quiet and Izaya liked it. He was pretty sure that if Alpha opened her big mouth he would snap. Just because she has been sheltered her whole life doesn't mean she can be so, so oblivious!

_I need to get back in control. Why is it so difficult! Is my madness taking over more and more? As long as I can survive for a month at the most, I will be okay. Yes, just think like this. No matter how much she annoys you or you just want to kill her, don't because soon it will. Be. Over! You must be calm and collected that was how you have been for your whole life except this year, _Izaya thought with vigor.

"Izaya. Izaya. Izaya . Izaya. Oh good I got your attention! Where are we going?" Alpha spoke. Izaya took a deep breath and counted to ten.

"We are going to Shinra's," Izaya wanted to speak with her as less as possible.

"Hm," he enjoyed when she used short sounds. He never would have believed that he would have gotten that pissed from hearing her talk. That scared him. He knew what most peoples' reactions would be, even his own but now, he knew nothing.

* * *

><p>Shinra was ordering some food when a knock came from his door. He waited until he was done with his order before moving towards the door. A yawn escaped his mouth before even making it to the door. He hasn't been sleeping well since Izaya was over.<p>

He opened the door to see a girl with long dull black hair. Her lifeless green eyes seemed to stare him down and it unnerved him.

"Shinra, Izaya-nii took me here to get some stitches for my hand," she held up her bandaged hand for him to see.

"Ah he did, did he? Where is he then?" Shinra ushered her inside. He knew who she was and it shocked him to see she was still alive at this point. He took her in as he waited for her answer. She looked barely feed, tired, and even rabbit like.

"Oh that. He said he had something to take care of," she looked at the candy that sat on his table and seemed to contemplate about having one. Shinra nodded giving her the okay to have one. She snatched it up greedily and popped it into her oral cavity.

"Ah," Shinra went to grab his medical bag with everything he needed. He started to work as soon as he came back.

"You are probably wondering why I haven't run away right," she didn't wait for an answer before moving on, "I figured he would feel slightly bad, you see. I knew the likely hood was slim but I could still hope, right? It was stupid yes, I do know this. I hate how I love him because I know my love for him will be the death of me but it's sad to saw that...I am okay with that. Maybe if I die it will snap him out of his insanity because I know I am too far gone but he could be saved even if it is a slim chance. Maybe the shock will bring him to his senses but I think I am just saying that so he won't be a lost cause."

She took a deep breath. Shinra was shocked, not just at her words but because she said this with no hint of sadness on her face. It made him wonder if the emotion he had seen cross her face: happiness and pain, was fake. He wanted to hear more, really he did but he finished with her stitches and before he could stop her she jumped up.

Now that he looked close he could see the fake happiness, "Okay thank you Shinra. I'll be going now."

He sighed and ran his hand through his hair. He plucked up his phone and walked next to the window. He saw Alpha bound across the street without looking twice to a figure. The figure looked like Izaya and Shinra figured he must be. He scrolled through his contacts till he found Celty.

_Hey Celty! Just wanted to let you know I am okay. Izaya sent Alpha here to get some stitches. She is so different and I don't mean insanity wise. To me see seems a little sane. She had a good reason why she is staying with Izaya. She blamed it on love to a degree. Hopefully she won't go through what she already went through again._ Shinra typed out. He hesitated on the send button wondering if he should say anything about Izaya but sent it anyways.

* * *

><p>"Izaya, Shinra seems pretty nice," Alpha bounced around him.<p>

"That is good," Izaya looked around bored with Alpha. He saw a pair of siblings, a girl and boy to be exact. A nagging feeling tickled his mind about Omega, "Alpha, what happened to Omega."

Sure he could use his informant powers but when he had someone who would give him information for free he would use it. Alpha stopped her unique walk.

"He settled down, not with a wife mind you, so he could keep watch on me," she shrugged.

"Do you want to see him," his satanic smile threatened to shine on his face.

"Of course! He is my brother," she beamed. Izaya smirked and kept walking. The seed of another plan was planted into his brain. Now if he can get Omega to come to them.

_Alpha's doctor must have called Omega by now saying she was removed from the hospital and taken to a private physician. He would have freaked out. Then when he heard my name he will fight himself about calling me or not. Finally he will and when he does...HAHAHAHAHA. I will invite him to a warehouse where Alpha can—_

* * *

><p><strong>Author's note: Okay so the length...yeah don't get angry because School started back up and I have Math and Biology now so I have to fix my schedule to fit it in. It probably wouldn't be so bad if I didn't also have a concert to go too but I must go support my friend! Not that I am complaining. Next week may have a short update, slow update, or no update because I have the BandChorus Dance so sorry. The next chapter will be a slight filler chapter but I only call it slight since I haven't elaborated on what happened to Celty when she saw Izaya.**

**Bye Bii~~**

**Kat-Baka**


	9. To The Stage

Celty inwardly smiled "seeing" the message from Shinra. After reading the message it had turned into a frown. She tried to imagine this young girl living with someone like him. Fear gripped at her just like she felt about aliens. Izaya was an alien to everyone.

_That poor girl but she seemed to be okay with it. Maybe she can help Izaya because I can't. The last time I saw him I saw __**that**__ scene, _she thought.

* * *

><p>Izaya was smiling and doing a weird skip walk thing like he does sometimes. He came out of an abandoned building which shocked her seeing as how far she was away from Ikebukuro and Shinjuku.<p>

He turned to her and smiled with a slight wave. Being spotted made her body froze. He kept on his merry way and disappeared from sight cause her body to unfreeze. Her body moved on its own to the door Izaya had come out of.

A stench coming from behind the door made her gag. It assaulted her senses and brought tears to her non-existent eyes. The stench clung to her body like second skin. She could almost feel the stench laughing at her for how many showers she was going to have to take afterwards.

She was afraid to open the door but not because she was afraid of the door but of what could be behind it. She touched the door knob tenderly as if it could bite or burn her. Its coldness seeped though her gloves which gave it a feeling of being supernatural or evil.

Celty turned the door knob and a blast of that stench pounded into her extinct airways. She choked and gagged on it. She "saw" the bodies and turned to throw up forgetting that she couldn't. In her stomach she could feel her shadows rising up.

_H-how could Izaya just walk out of here? Th-this scene is awful! The blood is everywhere and I-I am not even sure ho-how many bodies are here, _she thought with intensity, fear, and disgust.

The scene before showed truly just how far Izaya was gone. One head was only half there. The red tissue still leaked blood and brain matter. The head looked as though a lawn mower had been taken to that one side. Celty walked forward to get a look at the other bodies behind her.

Organs covered the ground. A heart sat on the dirty cold ground but it was still connected to the half naked woman. One eye was missing and the other was bloody. Her skull was crushed in and Celty noticed a bloody bat lying on the ground.

Celty knew Izaya used to only murder one person at a time and he would try to be different every time. Now he was like an animal using whatever he had. Killing as many as he could at the time. It was horrid!

Celty looked at the final body and saw the arms were torn off, as if actually ripped off by hands. The legs were purple and black and red. The baseball bat must have been the cause of that too. The mouth of the man had been but from the corners of the lips all the way to the jaw line.

Celty could only hope all of the victims had been dead or at least drugged while this happened. Her phone chimed signaling a message. It was from Izaya.

_Hey Celty-san~ 3! I hope you enjoyed my present! Well it was not intentionally for you but you found it so therefore it is yours. I hope you have a great day~ Oh and try to not get spotted if you leave. They may think you killed them~_

How could that jerk do that? Acting like he had not just killed three more people! It was inhuman! It was something that belonged in the dark ages not the twenty-first century! Izaya just switched with aliens as Celty's biggest fear.

Celty reached her hand up. She felt something fall from where her face would have been. It was compressed solid shadows. Where these supposed to be here tears? Another message came through to her phone, again from Izaya.

_Just like before I should have said I'm so sorry, but I felt nothing this time. But don't worry Celty it will all be over soon._

* * *

><p><strong>Author's note: Yay for insane Izaya! Not. It is really saddening to me to know that there is only at most five chapters left to the story line of Help Me. There will be some chapters after the story line is over though. <strong>


	10. Poor Thing

Izaya had left his loft while Alpha took a shower. He needed to get away from the girl plus he hoped that he could talk to Omega with out her listening in. A ring followed those thoughts.

"Hello Omega~," Izaya sang.

"You are such a piece of work! You know that? What have you done with Alpha?" Omega was turning out to be more annoying than Alpha.

"What have I done to her you ask? Well nothing in particular, unless you count messing with her mind of course. If you want to get back at me just come to the old abandoned warehouse you and Alpha used to play in. We will meet two days from now," Izaya hung up before he could get a bigger headache than he already had. Oh how he loved his easily manipulative humans! It was a high no one could beat!

When he got back Alpha was out of the shower and was watching a show that was equivalent to "Cops". She seemed to be enjoying it to a degree but a thinking scowl was on her face. Izaya took note of it but ignored her for now.

He sat at his desk and took out his thick rimmed reading glasses. He hated wearing them. It made him feel like he was the same as his humans. Maybe he needed to be brought down to the level of his humans seeing as how he has acted lately.

He couldn't focus on his work seeing as what was going to go down in two days. He knew he had to focus and get it done or else. He turned to Alpha seeing her asleep and smiled at the whole situation. It wasn't a happy smile nor was it a fake smile. It was a smile of understanding.

He understood that his humans would never love him like he loved them. He understood that even if he died that his humans would never love him; they may feel sorry for him but that is not love. His love for humans was more obsession than anything.

* * *

><p>The next morning Alpha woke to the smell of breakfast. Her mouth tingled and watered at the aromic smell. She clamored off the couch to the kitchen and saw Izaya sitting at a table. She could hear bacon sizzling behind him.<p>

She sat at the table ready for the food to be cooked so she could dig in. Izaya stared hard at the papers in front of him.

"Izaya is something wrong? You have been looking at papers since last night," Alpha questioned tentatively.

"Of course everything is fine. I am just getting work done because tomorrow we are going to go somewhere. Oh I forgot to say this but someone is trying to kill me so that is why we're going somewhere. Do you want to take care of them for me?" Izaya smirked at his little lie.

"Of course I want to help! If someone wants to hurt you I must hurt them! Is there any reason to ask! If you love someone you must put your life on the line for them, right?" Alpha stood from the chair and nocked it back.

"Oh Alpha you may love me but you know I don't love you. I don't love you at all. Actually you are one of the humans I hate most. The only ones who beat you are Shizu-chan and Namie. Your reaction was so funny! Hahaha!" Izaya laughed at her face. She stood her ground and tried to glare but she couldn't glare at him like she wanted.

Izaya stood and grabbed the spatula for the bacon. He split them half and half for each of them. Alpha looked at the bacon while Izaya eat silently. Her stomach growled so she finally broke down and ate.

Izaya felt sorry for her. He truly did. She loved to person who wanted to kill her and has even tried before. She would kill people who wanted to kill the one she loved. She was going to destroy herself for the devil.

The day went by slowly after the morning talk. Izaya had finally finished all his informant jobs. Alpha had sat on the couch, which now seemed to be becoming her favorite place, until she had to go to the bathroom. Izaya would have enjoyed for today to be tomorrow seeing as how he would be entertained.

Alpha was mulling over what Izaya had told her about someone wanting to kill him. Izaya had handed her a gun and she had been turning it over and over in her hands. She had shot guns before when she was with her parents and brother on vacation around the world. She loved the feel of it in her hands. The weight seemed to make the weights on her shoulders disappear.

Izaya watched her and the way she handled the gun. Her eyes would follow it in slow repetitive looks. She stopped and gripped the gun tightly. The skin turned white from the pressure she used to grip the gun.

"Alpha stop…go to bed it is pretty late," Izaya broke the silence that had been surrounding them since this morning.

She looked at him with a blank look before nodding her head and going to get a blanket from the closet. Izaya started to put his work up. He sighed as he took off his glasses and put them in a drawer. When he looked back to the couch Alpha was asleep.

* * *

><p>"Alpha wake up we are going to the warehouse today~," Izaya sang to the sleeping woman. She groaned and opened her eyes slowly. Her vision came into focus to see Izaya right in front of her face. A red tinge spread across her cheeks. Izaya leaned over to her ear.<p>

"Don't forget you gun," he whispered. She nodded robotically. He turned away and smirked at her discomfort. They both changed their clothes. Alpha wore a black knit off the shoulder shirt. She had tan cargo shorts that went mid-thigh.

"Where is this warehouse?" Alpha asked Izaya while checking the gun and the clip. Izaya just gave a smile that said you will see when you get there. Her silence was her comment to the unsaid words.

Ikebukuro was really busy at this time. People and gang members alike lined the streets going to places they should and shouldn't. In an alleyway Alpha could hear a woman screaming quietly. In another she heard a man and woman arguing about something she couldn't understand. Alpha could see so many bad things in the city, so many bad, scary and dirty things.

Izaya turned down another alleyway that Alpha knew led to the bad part of town. Alpha's eyes widened at all the prostitutes she saw. She threw up a little in her mouth seeing the whores, pimps, and drug sellers. Some looked her way and gave her a dirty look but then turned away figuring she was just another whore with a Master.

Izaya hated these humans. They were the humans no one wanted and used sex, drugs, and money to feel the love of another. The way they looked at Alpha made him sick but it wasn't a jealous sick, it was just a disgusted sick.

Alpha passed a mangy dog that looked as if it had seen better days. She felt compelled to put it out of its misery. It whined as it saw her looking at it. Izaya kept walking seemingly not taking in the sights around him.

A group of bikers looked at Alpha and started to wolf whistle at her. She blinked because that had never happened to her. Some prostitutes heard the call and came out of nowhere like bees to honey. The bikers took them off to an alley way and Alpha didn't even want to think about what was happening.

* * *

><p>A big warehouse was starting to be seen a few streets down. The last alleyway they passed had a man screaming stop, stop, no, please don't over and over and…over.<p>

The warehouse had a musty smell that swam under the doors to where you could smell it meters from the building. Alpha had a sense of déjà vu when she saw the building. It made her scrunch her face in confusion as she tried to figure out why she felt that way.

"Alpha wake up. We have to get set up, right? You don't want them to kill me, right?" Izaya feigned hurt. Alpha's eyes widened at what he said. She stuttered trying to say that she would never want him to die. He laughed at her.

Izaya pushed open the door and a blanket of dust poured out from inside the building. Izaya coughed slightly but Alpha seemed to be coughing up a lung. She hacked even after the dust had dispersed. It was dark and dank inside the warehouse. A chill seeped through both of the humans' clothes into their skin. Alpha shivered. She really did not want to be here.

"Hey Izaya, this is where I am going to wait for this person," Alpha said while pointing at a big machine with her gun. Izaya nodded and went up the stairs to the top area of the warehouse. He wanted to have the perfect view of what was about to go down. He felt as if he was on the top of the World!

Alpha took her magazine out of her gun and checked it over yet again. She checked to make sure the safety was still on even though the magazine was out. Her eyes wandered over it in a daze. She pulled back the slide and it made a click sound. She then checked the sights and looked at the door. It was too dark to see anything in detail but she could see the outline of things. She slid the magazine back into the gun with yet another click.

She was getting tired of waiting and was starting to nod off when a loud click followed by a boom woke her up. She turned towards the door and saw an outline of a person. Her eyes rolled to where Izaya was and saw a slight dip of his head. It was hard to see but the motion and the way her eyes adjusted to the darkness made it easier.

She moved her thumb deliberately to the safety and heard the faint click and the slight movement the pistol made. She slowly pulled back the slide trying to be as silent as possible. Her heart thumped like a song with a lot of bass. She took a calming breath and released it, in and out, out and in, like a mantra. The air moved slowly from outside into her nose then into her lungs. Time went slower as she took more breathes.

She raised her pistol and held it in a tight grip. She gripped the trigger and twitched her right pointer figure while deciding when would be a good time to pull. She took a deep and quiet breath and released it. When she couldn't let out any more air she focused on the outline of the man. She pulled the trigger.

The boom shook the building. The air seemed to have been sucked out of the room leaving it eerily silent and empty. The air was heavy; it seemed as if the air had been replaced with lead. Alpha's ears were ringing from the loudness of the gun. A wicked smile was on her face. It was a smile that was becoming close to Izaya's smile. It was a mix between a fallen angel and a heart breaker. She seemed to get some sick pleasure from it but on the inside she was freaking out. She had never killed someone before.

The body fell to the floor with a sickening thud. It echoed in the "lead air". She jumped up and looked at Izaya with a face of a puppy wanting to be approved. Izaya jumped down from second level. He had a pleased smile on his face.

"Good job Alpha," he looked at her like one would a puppy that just learned to listen to its master. He patted her head and looked at her. He contemplated about doing what he was about to do. He leaned towards her and kissed her. It was light but brought a full blown red blush upon Alpha's face. Izaya loved to see her reaction. If he didn't he would not have gotten within one meter of her. He grabbed her wrist and pulled her to the body. The light of the moon hit right through the broken glass window to show the body. Alpha screamed and fell to the ground in shock.

Omega lay on the ground bathed in the light of the moon. A bullet hole was right in the center of his chest. Blood was already pooled around him and was making its way towards Alpha. It wanted to wrap her up in itself and comfort her in its own way.

Alpha gripped her arms leaving a trail blood. She grabbed the top of her arms and dragged her nails down her arm. Skin cells and blood were trapped underneath her nails. She dragged her nails up and down her arms in the same spot. The tears that went down her face started to pool up. She started to hit her head against the ground and said no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no again and again.

Both of the siblings' blood mixed together. It swirled and Izaya just watched like a scientist would watch guniea pigs. Alpha passed out but from stress, anger, or blood loss, Izaya didn't know. He picked up Alpha and took her back to his home in Shinjuku. He would call up someone to take care of Omega's body later. For now he was going to have to deal with a very confused and maybe even "dead" Alpha.

* * *

><p><em>Author's Note: I did most of this chapter in one day, it was crazy! I really enjoyed writing this chapter and we have now had the third to final death. It's going to be great! I hope you had a happy and enjoyable read! Oh and by the way…I really like bacon.<em>

_-Kat-chan~_


	11. Dear Insanity

All she did was sit there. It had been two days since Omega's death, one since Alpha woke up, but she had stayed on the forsaken couch the whole time. He hated her and her pity. She made him want to kill, to let himself be taken over by that insanity. He couldn't stand her any longer. It didn't matter anyways because she was too far gone into that world that he had dragged her into.

It was hard trying to think of the best way to get ride of her. One reason was he didn't want to mess up his lovely loft when someone else was going to rent it out. Two, he didn't want someone to think anything was going on. Three, he did not want the others to know until it was over, over and done with.

Izaya just watched her as she ignored the basic needs of life. For three days now she had not went to the bathroom, took a shower, ate, or drank...anything. She was killing herself and that just pissed Izaya off. He was supposed to kill her for God's sake not herself! This was going to be a pain!

* * *

><p><strong>I could see Izaya watching me. It was annoying and slightly scary. He look so, so, so focused, too focused. He knew what he had done too, that jerk! I say this but I know that it doesn't matter; I love him too much to be this, this disturbed, angry, whatever I'm supposed to call it! Can I handle it though, that is the question.<strong>

**He will either toss me out into the world or he will take me back to that hell hole. I will not allow that even I will fight him back! His eyes seem to be burning holes into me, what do I do, what do I do? **

"**Izaya, what are you doing?" I asked cautiously. Hopefully he was not going to lose his sanity for a split second.**

"**And she speaks! I'm staring at you pitiful self, of course. I made you kill your brother yet you seem fine other than the fact of the mental insanity you are feeling. This is why you just piss me off. I can't seem to get you angry at me no matter how much I try. I have tried a lot mind you. What if I said I'm the one who got your parents killed in the car crash that left their bodies undistinguishable? What if I said I was the one who had them sent to America just so they could be killed, what would you do? Hah, just kidding!" Izaya watched me with intensity, waiting to see any reaction I had. All I did was clutch my fist. That was all he was going to get out of me. **

**He stood and grabbed his jacket and left with out saying anything else. It was really odd. I had almost lost my face. I almost attacked him but I must not let on anything, it's either die or have a chance of getting out alive. All I can do is hope that I will get out alive.**

**I stood from the couch and took a good look around the loft. I never really took time to and I wanted to get up anyways to get something to eat. Izaya's bedroom had nothing exceptional about it. A small book caught my attention, it looked warn, not as if it was used a lot but more like the owner did not take care of it. I flipped through it reading all the thoughts Izaya had about his murders. I soon got bored; I didn't care about the other deaths. I only care about ones that relate to me.**

**I walked into the kitchen and saw a knife. I picked it up and thought about how great it would feel to run it down his creamy white flesh. How it would feel as it gently broke the skin and go deeper as it went down, down, down. I couldn't keep the smile off my face as I thought this but then something hit me, it would be too messy.**

**I opened the medicine cabinet and looked though the bottles. I read the instructions and drug facts finding ones that could easily be slipped into his drink. Oh the face he would make! The terror that would show would make me laugh! Laugh till I couldn't breath and fell over! **

**I took time to crush them up and put them into a cup of tea with no sugar. I smirked I could see him foaming at he mouth as he overdosed. He would gasp and wheeze and I would stand there looking over him, laughing at his discomfort and or pain! I started laughing and snorting loudly as I couldn't hold it in anymore.**

**I fell onto the couch in a daze from the laughter. The happiness I was feeling was like some sick pleasure and it made me laugh even harder. I almost fell off of the couch once of twice but it still didn't stop me. Nothing could stop me not even death!**

**Izaya had his creep smile on when he walked through the doors. He glanced at me before walking to the kitchen and getting some thing to drink. He didn't pick up the spiked drink and instead grabbed a bottle of water. Damn him!**

**I decided to give up with that idea for now and decided to take a turn-skin-red hot shower. The hotter the shower was the better it helped me think. I glanced at Izaya to see what he was doing and no surprise he was or at least seemed to be working.**

**I looked at my self in the mirror of the bathroom. The markings that Izaya had carved stuck out against my pale skin. The words that echoed though my head were always with me. Always!**

**I watched the water fill up the tub and how it swirled as the new water hit the old. Steam started to rise from the bath so I turned the knob to cold then turned the water off. I stuck my hand in and thought about how perfect the water felt. I poured bubble bath in the tub and twisted my hand around to mix up the solution.**

**I smiled and got into the heavenly water. I was covered up to my neck in bubbles. It was so relaxing I feel into a light sleep but it was deep enough that I couldn't hear anything. My mouth moved along to the words of an English song.**

**Something grabbed my head and pushed me underwater. My hands reached out and grabbed at soft flesh and started to claw it. I was not going to die like this! I would not allow this! I saw blood fall into the water and start turning it a light red pink color. I knew who was killing me and that jerk had the nerve to do it while I was relaxing!**

**My lungs were starting to burn and I could almost feel them eating themselves trying to get more oxygen. My face was starting to get cold even though the water was hotter than normal body temperature. I could feel my thoughts as well as my attacks slowing down. I felt like I was going to explode from lack of air!**

**At the last moment before I faded into unconsciousness Izaya pulled my head above water. His face held a smile of sick pleasure. He looked at his arm that as covered in scratches before looking at me again. **

"**Izaya...I. Hate. You," I wanted this to be said before I died. It had to get out into the open air. If I was going to die I had to leave him with something because even in death I shall not be forgotten!**

**Izaya looked at me knowingly before forcing me mouth open. His hand had grabbed roughly my face and slammed my head down onto the bottom of the tub. It felt like a train had slammed into my brain.**

**Water flowed down my throat into its new ocean, my stomach. I coughed and hacked but it just made more water go down my lungs. Soap also went down and left a taste in my mouth. The world had shifted between the Rabbit and the Fox.**

_**This is the end. I will give up for now Izaya but there are other rabbits and they can fight back better**_**, I thought. My heart slowed to a crawl and by this time all I saw was darkness. The only things I heard was the loud ritardando of my heart. It started to fade into the background and then it ended. I had been killed by the one I used to love.** **The naive Rabbit was finally being taken down by the cunning Fox. The game was almost complete.**

* * *

><p>Izaya looked at her and contemplated how to get ride of the body. He hoped his idea would work or else he would be sent to prison. He knew he would not survive in a prison with his slightly female body and features.<p>

Izaya pulled Alpha out of the shower and tried not to touch her too much as he pulled on the dead girls clothes. He glanced at his arm and sighed at the scratches that adorned it. Hopefully he would not get a disease.

He grabbed a few large black trash bags and stuffed Alpha in one. He then put that bag into another and another. He did this to make sure the bag wouldn't break as he was walking down the streets. He slung the bags over his back, took one last look around his loft, and shut the door forever.

People didn't look twice at Izaya, whatever he was doing was his business, they would think. They didn't question the smile on his face or the giddy laughter that would escape his prison of a mouth every once and awhile. They didn't question the look of absolute pleasure, happiness, and cunningness on his face.

Izaya walked all of the way to Ikebukuro without seeing Shizuo's face. That made him even happier. If he had seen Shizuo his plan would have failed and Izaya doesn't like it when his plans fail. The weight of Alpha was making his shoulder hurt but if he stopped now it would end, everything, everything he worked for would have ended so he had to push on.

When he arrived at the park he made a b-line to the woods. He just threw the body to the ground before walking away. He pulled his phone out from his coat pocket and found Shizuo and Celty in his contacts. He had a feeling the two were together but it was a safety precaution to just message both.

_Hey Shizu-chan~! You should come to the park...you know the one where you fought Saika's children...There is a present for you and Celty in the woods straight in front of the entrance~_

He tapped the send button and left with a giggle. He was sad that now it was back to the bad part of Ikebukuro again. He started to type again, this time a message to Celty.

* * *

><p>Shizuo glared at the text he had on the screen of his phone. The phone was crushed as Celty just stared at her message. She was happy Shinra said she could come back but now this message scared her. She had seen what Izaya could do.<p>

"Kill. Kill. Kill. Kill. Kill," Shizuo wasted no time before hopping on Celty's horse. A helmet was handed to him before Celty took off. She was pretty sure she could hear her heart pounding even if she didn't have one.

The park was not crowded which made both of the monsters happy. The woods were ominous and hid the terror from view. Celty and Shizuo both got off Shooter. They walked trying to find the present. Not knowing what they were supposed to be looking for gave their minds lead to wander.

Celty's right foot kicked something plastic and squishy. Her head dropped down to see a black trash bag. Shizuo appeared at that moment.

"What do you think it is Celty? A body," Shizuo joked. Celty held up her phone. Shizuo read the words.

_Let's find out._

She made a small blade out of her shadows and cut it along the back slowly. She was careful not to mess up what was inside. She could feel herself shake slightly. She pulled the two cut halves apart and showed to the word what the present was.

Her body shook and she fell backwards. Shizuo's eyes widened. The flea had done it; the flea had actually killed Alpha.

"Damn him," Shizuo muttered. An innocent girl had been killed; an innocent girl who had loved her killer, the same innocent girl who had shot her brother by accident, had also died with a smile on her face.

* * *

><p><em><span>Author's Note: Ah, poor Alpha. One more chapter and then the epilogues, it's such a bittersweet feeling though. R.I.P Alpha. At least she died happy, eeerrrr well happy-ish.<span>_


	12. Don't Get Lost in Heaven

The old life for the flea was close to over. Every time he took a breath he got closer and closer to the end. The old Izaya would have never considered suicide as an option but the new Izaya; well, that was a different story. This new Izaya was a monster, more of a monster than Shizuo could ever be. Izaya couldn't let anyone get the satisfaction of anyone but himself killing him; if it was someone else, say some enemies perhaps, he would never be found and Izaya at least wanted to be found.

He knew he had to think quick before anyone found him. They would probably figure out soon that he would choose to go to a place he hates the most to hind himself. All the vulgar things that were around him made him sick. He felt so sick that sometimes he just threw up. He couldn't handle it and what scared him the most was now his body considered him vulgar enough to get sick.

* * *

><p>Izaya stared at the list he had written down. His hands had shaken when he wrote it making his perfect handwriting disappear. He read over every option over and over and over and over. It made the old Izaya that was buried deep in his soul wail. The wailing caused his stomach to sing in agony.<p>

_Gunshot, electrocution, hanging, bleed out, overdose, and suffocation, which one would be best. Not hanging or overdose, _Izaya thought. He drew a thin line through those two. It wouldn't leave enough of an impact; no he wanted to go out with a bang. He did not want to be forgotten, to become just another statistic.

His eyes just wandered around the room and when he came back into focus it had been an hour. He had to get prepared! It would happen soon, tonight to be exact! It would all finally come to an end! He grabbed a paper and started to write one of his final notes to the world.

_Dear Human(s),_

_I can't stand this part of me anymore. I held off as long as I could to see if someone, anyone, would try to help. You humans disgust me, you didn't even try. I must now take matters into my old hands and do something the old Izaya Orihara would never do. At this moment there are five more hours until it will be over. When you find this I shall be dead. I even planned it down to exactly when I would have to start if I wanted to die before you go here. I am planning it all out. The only thing I regret was ever hoping you would help me and how I was not able to control myself._

_Izaya Orihara_

It was close to being all over and Izaya kept having second thoughts. If he sat to long doing nothing it would allow him to think, think like he shouldn't. He thought of the pain he would feel as it happened. He thought of the many ways he could die. He only had one death, it had to be perfect.

The time had finally come and Izaya was about to put a message out for them to see. He used his phone to access the internet and logged onto the Dollars site.

_Anonymous: You will never guess what I just saw! Izaya Orihara seems to be committing suicide. Someone better come quickly or he will be just another percentage!_

Done, done, it was all over. The final countdown was beginning. Izaya curled his hands around his flick blade. He had to start soon if he wanted to be dead by the time the toys arrived. He pulled the knife out of his pocket and flicked it open.

He focused on the small noise it made. He focused on the coloration. Every cut he made would be repentance. Every cut would be another life he had taken. Every drop of blood would be him freeing himself. Every second that he got closer to death was another closer to his perfect world.

He made the first cut timidly. He was scared of the pain. He was scared he would turn out to enjoy this. He took in a sharp breath before starting to slash, then he made another, and another, and another, he made them until his whole body was burning from the pain. He came into focus after zoning out while doing it and saw blood all over the couch, table, wall, and anything close to him.

His vision got blurry from the blood loss but he still went on. His cuts got deeper, quicker, less precise and more desperate, more primitive, more...unlike Izaya. He got closer to the edge of Break Down Mountain. He got closer to the end.

Tears crawled from behind Izaya's eyes and started to make themselves known. It was painful, almost too painful for Izaya to take but this was his punishment. This was his private hell. He would have to deal with the hell for a little longer.

The tears burned his laceration sites as they rolled down his face. The blood loss was too much and Izaya could not even hold up his flick blade anymore. He fell onto his side not being able to hold himself up anymore. He realized in this moment that people were yelling out side. He could hear a dog bark and the nice old lady in the room above him listening to her record player. In this moment he learned that the world was not a complete loss.

The voices got closer and he could recognize one voice but he couldn't place it. His mind was too fuzzy just like when he drank that one time. He forced his eyes to stay open even though he was about to die. He wanted to hear more of this peaceful world he had never heard before; he was able to see the world differently now that he was about to die, too bad he could enjoy it.

The door was knocked down surprising the informant. He blinked in and out of consciousness trying to become away of whom had broke the door. He saw blonde hair and a black body suit. He knew who it was, or well he at least thought he did. Their names were there like a dream that you can not remember.

Izaya could hear them talking, fumbling on their words, but it ran together in a slurred like speech. He felt nothing and that made him happy. Everything he had felt: pain, despair, and mental loss were gone. He finally decided he had held on to his consciousness long enough and decided it was time to die.

"Thank you Shizuo...Celty...for...coming this...time," he had remember their names in the last moment. His speech had slowed and started to decrescendo until it was almost inaudible. He had died leaving the game to finally be over.

Shizuo and Celty stared at the man who looked so much like a toddler at this moment. He had tears steaming down his face yet had a peaceful look as if death had given him a new freedom from himself; at least the duo hoped so. One thing they did know was that Izaya would not be forgotten.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Author's Note: Wahhhhh...I am so sad. This is the end except for the prologues. Izaya why did you have to be so insane? The first prologue is going to be for Shizuo so look forward to it. <strong>_


End file.
